I'm sorry to hear that. I hope your children are experiencing a different childhood and you're breaking the cycle.

That parenting stance of dominant, complete-control, do as I say, is such a shit, out dated, Victorian story in our culture. It makes me rage inside when I see parents take the 'you do what I say because I'm the adult', as if being alive longer somehow equates to competence, capability and the earning of respect and authority. Families don't have org charts and strict hierarchies whose purpose is to create conformity. Families are there to nurture new humans so they can flourish in and be a meaningful part of society and the world.

Sorry, went on a bit there. But hopefully it strikes a cord with you and together we realise we're right in challenging that shit, outdated story.